When I am not a nanny, or a photographer I am a friend to middle school girls. My husband, Shaun, is the youth pastor at our church…which means I get to hang out with some of the most amazing and…dare I say it RAD people on earth. Middle schoolers. They make me so happy, in so many situations I feel more comfortable with a 12 year olds than I do with adults.
A couple weeks ago we had a tea party…here is the outcome of that event. LOVED it. by the way.
there i’ve said it out loud. no more hiding behind great tea and a small plate of these amazing cookies. i KNOW they are not that great for me, but i just can’t seem to help myself. completely counter-productive to the hour that i spent at the gym today. but i continue to eat them.
what. is. wrong. with. me!!?? I just can’t stop. It is very (very) likely that I ate about half of the package today.
but we all have our little secret and simple pleasures that we have to indulge in every once in a while. in photography my tragic downfall is my 50mm 1.8 lens, for anyone who has spent some time behind this lens with me you know it as the “eyeball” lens.
And believe me, I LOVE the eyeball lens.
But after a while I have to take a step back and change my perspective. Its healthy to do that. and challenging to have that breath of fresh air.
I know I can’t eat Pecan Sandies for every meal, although I would, I shouldn’t. Just like I know that I can’t stick to what I am comfortable or love so much in photography. I think its a motto, or at least a goal, to do something different at each shoot I go out on. If its using a different lens (that changes my perspective) or a new pose or a new prop…somethings I am going to love. Others I’m going to never, ever do again. But the point is that I’m not stagnant. I’m growing. Being challenged and becoming the best photographer I can be for right now.
This is all I can ask for. I pray God opens the doors. and when he does I fall to my knees and ask for the courage to walk through. and when I do, I fall to my knees again and ask for the strength to make it to the other side. I am LOVING this process of becoming a photographer. I feel like my passion and joy for life is being renewed.
Ick. This is the kind of practice you go through because I KNOW it will make me a better person.
No. Wait.
It will make my business stronger. There, thats it. I went to a photographer meeting last night (because I’m a photographer now) and I heard the speaker say “you have to build your barn before you build your house” or something along those lines. He was quoting it from someone else, and here I am…probably infringing on someone’s royalties or something. But thats not the point. The point is that I have to have discipline in how I run this business. Because if I don’t…it won’t matter if I am the greatest photographer in the world…this will eventually burn and die.
I don’t want that. This means too much to me.
This is tedious, tedious work. And it makes my head spin thinking about plans, goals, vision and how I am going to get there.
Over the Christmas break, while I was soaking it up in Hawaii, Michelle emailed me about a video that I had talked about doing when we photographed her senior photos…I’m trying my hand a imovie!! Hope this get rave reviews from everyone out there!!